Being on the left is convenient and has a number of advantages:
1 You are never responsible for your own crap!
You have n’t achieved anything in life and people just don’t want to understand that you are neither man nor woman, but a cucumber? Then we have good news for you:
If you become a leftist now, you have a rich arsenal of scapegoats at your disposal. You can just blame society, calcified conservative norms, the patriarchy, old white men or the Germans. That doesn’t change the overall situation, but it feels a lot better right away.
2 You are one of the best people in the world!
Leftists are incredibly good people! If you are now wondering whether there is something more to it than a political attitude – good deeds, for example – then we would like to answer you at this point: No.
Be left, be good and show everyone; whether they want to see you or not! That’s enough to get your fellow human beings to believe in your moral superiority at all times. Cool right?
3 You don’t have to have exhausting discussions anymore!
The practical thing about being one of the good guys: whoever is against you is one of the bad guys . Logical! And since it is clear that you are right, there is no need to debate it.
If a rational argument does not fit into your worldview, you can always react emotionally and just scream. Nobody will think you’re irrational. You are just very empathetic.
4 You decide who is a Nazi or a fascist!
Historical and scientific elaboration of a political worldview in order to be able to specify more precisely? Pretty fascist. In the end, as a leftist, you decide what is an opinion and what is already fascist.
Love of home? Fascist. Family? Fascist. Heteronormative genders? Fascist. Guiding culture? Fascist. Border Guard? Hitler adjacent.
5 You are the savior of the third world!
Your willingness to help other people increases proportionally with their distance from Canada. The approach of “making a big difference with little money on site” is too boring for you.
You prefer to bring the people who could actually build their countries to Canada. Maybe not necessarily in your hip trendy neighborhood, but at least within selfie reach. And that’s a good thing!
Who knows how many wells or schools have been built in Africa? But with an Insta-Post, everyone sees it!
6 You belong to the colorful civil society!
Nazis are almost on the verge of seizing power. Therefore you can now defend yourself from the beginning, fight for an open and tolerant society and be a hero.
And all that alone, only with the support of the media, schools, universities, large companies, associations and parties. So be brave.
7 You can choose a new gender at any time!
Masculinity and femininity are pretty bad. One is constantly confronted with role models and sexist clichés . One day you can’t get pregnant because you have no uterus, the next day you can’t be a man just because you don’t have a penis. Unfair!
So now you should definitely become a leftist. There are so many genders open to you every day. So what will it be? Gender-variable, androgynous, bisexual, XY woman, pangender or transgender-demiqueer? Nothing for you? Would you rather think of one yourself? No problem, anything else would be discrimination!
8 You can really express yourself in the coolest courses!
Math, physics, engineering and biology are just plain oppressive constructs of the white man. A self-respecting leftist attends progressive courses such as “Gender Studies”, “Integrated Climate System Science” and “Democracy Education School Development and Social Skills”.You can actually do anything. Just make sure that there is no way you will ever get a job with the subject of your choice.